This is one evening recently in Hogan House, after Ian had gone back to Seattle. Just came upon it now in Blogger's green room, where it was languishing because it did not, actually, work one-fingered on my phone, as it says at the bottom. The pictures were too much for it.
I thought some sort of porridge would be good, and Ian had bought this complete protein grain and legume cereal mix, to snack on at the Dacha, but he hadn't taken it down before leaving. It had instructions for cooking (heat, with soy or almond milk and water), and I had some raisins and I . . . I paused and considered, and I thought, what are all those grains, etc, anyway? And then I saw that they included lentils. I thought of the mealy texture of lentils, and the sweet nature of porridge, particularly as I was envisioning it, and my digestive tract paused its habitual gurgle.
I considered a moment, then decided that, for primarily moral reasons, I would go ahead as planned and cook this lentil porridge that was so nourishing and complete.
I measured and poured, cereal and cow's milk (note: not a milk on the recommended list). Hogan House is well-stocked with small sauce pans (if not teaspoons), which is nice as you cycle through them. It is particularly not nice when you remember that Hogan House is not well-stocked with dishwashers, especially with one of them--the preferred one--back in Seattle. But I was in the well-stocked phase, so the issue of saucepans didn't come up.
As the porridge warmed and began thickly to simmer, I tasted, then put in a little more sugar and cinnamon, and another toss of raisins. The sense that I was throwing good raisins and sugar and cinnamon after bad was subtle enough that I could elbow it out of the way.
When the porridge was finished, I ladled myself a bowl and made myself comfortable on the sofa in the living room. I took a tentative bite.
I managed to worry down, with increasing difficulty, about 6 spoonsful. Each spoonful tasted more like lentils. Each spoonful felt more like lentils--warm, creamy, raisiny, cinnamony, lentils. I finally had to admit defeat--I had created a culinary disaster. Even my moral sense agreed. I put the bowl back in the kitchen and found a suitable replacement. I did not feel guilty throwing the porridge out the next day, when I found its congealed mass still in the bowl on the counter from the night before.
That's what I'm talkin' about! Cocoa Krispies with VITAMIN D! And milk with VITAMIN D! Take that, Ezekiel!!! (oh, boy was it tasty)
one-fingered on my phone